Midsommar Blues

This weekend was Midsommar which is a beautiful drunken festival celebrating the longest day of the year...it was also Carp's and my 12th Anniversary. I am going to a midsommar party next weekend thank god or I would be facing some serious withdrawl. At Midsommar you dance around a maypole singing a song about frogs, you pick flowers, you consume obscene amounts of alcohol including snaps which isn't anything like peach schnaps, you play games you sing songs and you eat from a table laden with foods like ham, swedish meatballs, lots of herring, shrimp and rice... a beautiful traditional smorgasbord. It is a magical time ... ok maybe it is the booze talking but it was a time when memories were made...I wrote a speech at my parents midsomar party two yeas ago which was their last at their soon to be old house here it is.

"This week I got my order from Amazon.com. I had had a bad day and each song put me in a better and better mood who the hell needs wine I found it surprising that as I put each CD in I was transported back to midommar parties of my past. I remembered midsommar on Francis street where the maypole was placed in the backyard after someone thought we were going to burn it standing up for our race. I remember every year I wanted to wear a specific dress it was cream and had patches on it, with my ruffled underwear. Those were the days of Sigge, Gundel, Claus, Sten o Flisa the gang Maud jumping in the sack and revealing more than she wanted. I remember the dart board with the pictures from dirty magazines that people would throw darts at to find out who was on their team. Those were the days of Ring Ring, People need Love, Hasta Manana, Waterloo, Dancing Queen, Fernando.....Good times were had by all I would eventually fall asleep to raucous laughter and the continuous skoaling and Helan Gor. Then as we kids got older we eventually moved up to the cemetary, I remember the mosquito inn and the arrows to pee in the grass. The games got crazier and the alcohol flowed as did the singing and hugs. These were the days of Thank-you for the Music, I have a Dream which notably Denise and I were going to sing on a float in the Santa Claus parade, and then came Voulez Vous which my dad bought for me in Sweden before it hit stores in Canada. Then came Super Trouper...The Way Old Friends Do which I believe is the gangs unofficial Theme song and the song which played on the most important Midsommar, in my book, 10 years ago our wedding day.
Our midsommars on Louisa I must say I believe were the most legendary...remarkable really when you think of the ages that all got together those were the days of Sarah and the boys, miscellaneous friends, and the odd stray mom felt sorry for, Mr Menzies, Mr Cathmoir always Oma who needs an old farmer when you have us eh Oma (Wen braucht en alter bauer wenn dich habe uns.) There we survived danceoffs between mamma and Johan, skinny dips at the neighbours and at the beach, guests picked up at the post office, dancing barefoot in the streets and on that wrap around porch. We have seen significant others come and go with the 2nd generation of the gang and then we have seen some who have met the craziness and survived and stayed...Thank-you Carp.
Then we have come to this beautiful spot on the hill with the addition of Faster Bojan, the Carpenters, the Thompsons Pat and Gord, Anders and Birgitta now and again, Nime and his coordination bar none, Mary and Bill, Mr. Cathmoir who sadly has a further distance to go. The youngest generation has grown substantially, the games have been cut back because of the danger factor and dad just admit it you are getting a little older, and the nights seem to be getting shorter and shorter each year. Some members are very missed, Faster Bojan what an inpiration, Mr Menzies has My Bonny ever sounded so good, Mr Cathmoir forever the gentleman and Madison Brown Girl in the ring, Gundel the original swede. There are many things that haven't changed it is a magical night filled with singing, Dancing, ABBA, Boney M etc, always an unpredictable night, the Midsommar stang however droopy, the song sheets however stained and tattered, Peter and Nime's unique game play, the awe inspiring food, the I Know I should not drink it but still do Snaps and the eclectic group of people and the fact that after thirty years mamma and pappa you still know how to throw a party. So I would now like to raise my glass to mamma and Pappa for thirty years of craziness and magic and to Brian for making midsommar even more special Happy Anniversary."

Another reason Why I am a content mother of boys

Thanks Kelly over at http://www.donmillsdiva.blogspot.com/ for this one... The picture says it all, High heels for babies. Why am I glad I am the mother of 3 amazing boys at this very moment I don't have to deal with idiotic products like these.

The Fenelius Grandkids

Axel 5, Andrew 6, David 4, Erik 9 months and Hanna 3 in mamma's garden.

My life's soundtrack

If you ever had a soundtrack what would it be well if it was today ...it would go something like this....

The Way old Friends Do ABBA This would be my anthem the song I walked down the aisle to... the song I want played at my funeral
Så Skimmrande vär aldrig havet Marie Fredriksson the most beautiful song old Evert Taube classic describing your first kiss takes me back to singing Evert Taube visor with mamma at the piano
What A Wonderful World Louis Armstrong
Peace Train Dolly Parton and Ladysmith Black Mambaza a beautiful version ...surprisingly
The Unicorn Irish Rovers
123 Like a Bird I see Tim McGraw Andrew David singing this version is much better
Glory Days Bruce Springsteen
Big League Tom Cochrane takes me back Falcons Rule
All Summer Long Kid Rock wow parts of this were written for us in the 80's hmmm was he at the den...
Öppna Landskap Ulf Lundell The unofficial Swedish National Anthem describing all the best parts of each part of Sweden god it makes me home sick
My town Montgomery Gentry
I'm a Bitch Alanis Morisette
Dark Horse Amanda Marshall personal it wasn't a good place but lessons learned
Why Tracy Chapman Kpalime buying black Market tapes wtih Gudrun and David
Wish you were here Pink Floyd Steve Chern, Tony, 9 11
Pink Cadillac...Bruce Springsteen Kuma Dunyo Kokou singing to me Caroline instead of Pink Cadillac
We didn't start the fire Billy Joel listen to the words that takes talent
Did you ever love a woman Bryan Adams
Brown eyed Girl Van Morrison
7 day Fool Jully Black makes me laugh as I clean
Good Mother Jann Arden
Not ready to Play nice Dixie Chicks gotta love honesty
I didn't want to need you Heart this one is personal Sweden 1989 Carp
Serena Ryder the Winter Waltz The absolute most haunting love song ever
Friends in low places Garth Brooks Marty Graw good friends who are still here
Strawberry Wine Deanna Carter

not hard to tell its summer time...

Bet you're trying for a girl...

I will admit each pregnancy I thought I was having girls...Andrew as I said before was Maja, David was Annika and Erik was Elise. I do not feel robbed because I do not have a daughter, I do not feel I am or will miss out on anything because I d not have a daughter, I do not feel secretly incomplete because my brood is void of estrogen. I feel that there are certain strong women who are put on this earth to raise good strong boys who will make good strong partners in their later relationships. I believe that out there is a girl I will later on in life have a unique and amazing relationship with just like I have been honoured and blessed with in my relationships with my aunt Gittan a mother of 4 boys and my there are no words for it relationship that I have with my friend Sarah another mother of 4 boys. I know my relationship with my two neices and possibly with the daughters of my future brother in law Richard will be unique and special and allow me to escape from my testosterone encompassed lair. And to those individuals who meet me in the stores, the post office, my work and feel it is okay to push their pity on me in front of my boys with your comments... "you poor girl with all these boys" ( poor girl...I get to get down and dirty, catch frogs, balls anything you throw at me, build things out of LEGO, blocks, sticks you name it and I get covered in messy sticky, muddy kisses every chance I get...poor girl my ass) "so are you going to try again for a girl..." ( all I can say are you INSANE), "you will miss having a daughter when you get older they take care of you like nobody else" (come visit me at the senior's home....I guess I will miss out on the huge bouquets of flowers, treats snuck in, my sons feeding me chips in bed, holding vigil as I lay dying, taking me out for a drive, yeah that's too bad...sons don't do a damn thing). Yeah to all those people ... do I need to say it.... you can kiss my truck bumped, lizard kissed, insect squished, sticky, loud, messy, busy, muddy baby blue covered fanny.

Darian and Hanna

I have the honor and blessing of being an aunt to the 2 most stubborn, amazing, girls Hanna and Darian. My brother's daughter Hanna has red hair and is the funniest little person and is a mother hen to my boys especially David. Darian is in between Andrew and David in age and is my brother in law Duane's daughter. I am a mother of boys but with that comes the need to pass on your words of wisdom and advice to some special girl. I am so lucky that I will have a special relationship with my neices that no one else will have. My thing is letters, my cousins Krister and Jan have daughter's Mikaela and Moa and after both of them visited a few years ago on separate occssions I wrote them letter's in my bad Swedish spelling with my words of wisdom...they were teenagers at the time and now I await to give Hanna and Darian their letters. Today I share them with you...

There are a few things about life that I have learned and I would like to share them with you today.
· Firstly family is the most important thing you have ...when one is little, when you are a teenager, even when you are a thirty year old woman and even if they are a pain in the ass sometimes.
· Keep and cherish some real great girlfriends you don’t need a whole pile you need someone to stand up to you and call you on your shit, someone who has known you forever, someone you can call at 3:00 in the morning for anything, someone who will pat your back when you need it and someone who will pull you down onto the ground when your head gets to high up in the clouds, someone who can make you laugh and forget about your own crisis even if its for just a little while they are all important they can be one and the same or 3 or 4.
· Boys: Know that you are important and never let anyone tell or treat you any different. Never be afraid to stick up for yourself or say what you think, stay true to yourself, don’t change for anyone in the end it won’t work
· Remember that sometimes all you gotta do is shut up and listen.
· Sadness is good sometimes it teaches us how to appreciate the joy in life.
· Relationships are work and constantly changing.
· No one will stand up for you if you don’t stand up for yourself.
· You will need to have your heartbroken a few times to know what love really feels like.
· Take care of yourself and love yourself.
· Take a chance sometime in life do something totally different and do it yourself.
· You can feel sorry for yourself once in a while but know there are many people worse off than you.
· There is time for work and time for play.
· Don’t ever forget where you came from but never let it decide our path.
· Read, read, read, about everything and never be afraid to ask questions.
· Never be afraid to try something new even if it means changing your toilet.
· Don’t forget to sometimes stop, breathe and take it all in.
· Never be ashamed about your decisions in life good or bad they are a learning experience.
· Try all kinds of jobs and be open to learning form them and respect the people that do them for life, I have flagged, worked in a factory, put in phone lines, worked as a PSW, worked as a manager in an office, I have worked in stores, in a library, as a waitress, in a women’s shelter, I learned lessons from each one of my jobs and I have the utmost respect the people that do these jobs for a living

-Take responsibility for your actions and mistakes, learn from them and move on.

- Bad things happen to good people all the time...if something bad happens to you don't dwell in it and don't keep using it as a crutch for bad behaviour

-remember you always have a choice even if it is as simple as gtting out of bed in the morning
· You can rely on others but the one you rely on the most is yourself.
· You cannot be all things to all people.
· You will never be good at everything.
· Love and respect your parents.
· Love and respect your siblings there may come a day what you only have each other.
· You will always have a home in my house and no matter what you do who you become I will always love you.
· The most important Tjejer är bäst. Learned from Kalle my uncle in Sweden. Girls are the best.